This was originally posted in July, 2016 by Marina Lisjonok MSW, E-CYT, RRT. She still draws on this experience today.
Since I got back from my 3-month silent meditation retreat in Nepal, I have been asked (more times than I can count) “So how was it?”
I’ve found that’s a question that’s really hard to answer briefly! The experience of being silent, while watching, learning, and living within the external and internal worlds, is a rich experience indeed. There were some pretty tough moments (internally and externally) and some moments that were beyond blissful. Perhaps surprising to many, I can’t say that I was bored – even though all my days were filled with my mouth being shut in long sessions of meditation. Even the cooking, eating, resting and visiting with my Lama were not dull.
Perhaps that was because my inner world was a riot: my mind could take me from a deep dark place to the mountaintop of Nirvana and back to the hole, and back up again. These polarities were pretty intense and at times scary. I couldn’t run away from any of these experiences; I was in silence with myself by myself. So I faced them, accepted them, and worked with them with the help of the practice, teachings and guidance from my teachers and community.
Related Reading: How I Got “Lucky”: Facing My Fear
When these waves of experience passed, the experience of unwavering peace, stillness and internal silence took over my whole being. I just wanted to bathe in that peace all the time! It was steady, powerful and profound.
Throughout my journey, especially through the tough moments, I kept reminding myself of Carl Jung’s observation: “Who looks outside – dreams, and who looks within – awakens.” I also remembered “with LOVE and PATIENCE everything is possible.” And I frequently fell back on an affirmation I came up with on my own: “Don’t worry, don’t judge, don’t complain, don’t cling, don’t obsess and don’t fear!!! Listen!!!! Trust, accept, understand, forgive, let go, appreciate, LOVE and ENJOY!!!”
Related Reading: 7 Tips for Cultivating a Successful Meditation Daily Practice
With all of these affirmations, I was able to transform a lot of my thought and belief patterns, reverse my emotions, and develop trust and ease and a sense of flow. I am pleased to share these affirmations with you. Please use them or develop your own to help you overcome your own struggles. After all, each one of us has struggles, no matter how great our life may appear to be. In that way, none of us is alone. You are not alone. You are never alone – even in silence.
Using her previous background in nursing, work as an Experienced Certified Yoga teacher, and a Master of Social Work, Marina Lisjonok helps her clients heal. She combines counseling techniques with yogic practices in group and individual sessions to create a safe space and to empower clients to use new tools for self-exploration and discovery. Marina’s goal is to help clients regain physical, mental, and/or spiritual well-being and a revived enthusiasm and excitement about life. She offers services in English and Russian in the Glen Ellyn office of Life Care Wellness.
